The Budge-Nuzzard

My brain has children. This is one of them. Click post titles for the podcast version.

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Location: Weem-Ti

Newly arrived and hideously gnawed.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Elwood

Hideously Gnawed.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Wisdom of the Weem

The Sha-Una’s hairlessness is somewhat lessened of late. That marsupial titan is now covered from brow to loping toe in a rather unpleasant and stubbly growth. Even so, no such stubbility can stay the mad determination of our endeavor. Onward the Sha-Una strides, and onward do I ride within, peeking out, searching ever for some sign or clue to lead us at last to the domain of the Enthoovian.

The length (not even to mention breadth and depth) of our search is maddening and I often find my mind has wandered away and I must run to fetch it ere it escapes entirely. Thus have I lately begun to occupy it with the wisdom of the Weem. From out of memory I have plucked those morsels of wit and wonder that have kept me sane for minutes at a time, and I recite them now to my brain, to calm it and tempt it not to wander.

It was during one of these solemn recitals that I knew I must share such wisdom. For if such things could lead grand Weem-Ti to its place among the greatest of all civilizations, so too could it lead the odd folk of this far and untidy land. Therefore, heed now the wisdom of the Weem and gloan upon it ere we speak again.


“When you bite the Nuzzard, the Nuzzard bites into you!” -Bornholt the Wider


“Upon no mound!” -Anonymous


“If you look into your heart and find a small sharp-toothed man lurking there…run!” -Theophillip


“Never was there a more smoldered lip.” -Needwole the Tyrant


“Love crosses all boundaries, and is often shot for trespassing.” -Bornholdt the Wider


“Three! Three! Three!” -King Todd III


"Once a mole, always really dirty and blind.” -Theophillip


“To know thy death, is to know thy self…but not for very long.” -Bornholdt the Wider


“Honor thy elders, that they may not beat thee with a spiny rod." -Man recently beaten with a spiny rod