The Budge-Nuzzard

My brain has children. This is one of them. Click post titles for the podcast version.

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Location: Weem-Ti

Newly arrived and hideously gnawed.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006


In my upper head there is a great celebration, for the cessation of my long plodding has come! Have I at last achieved that feverishly sought Voonville? Nay. But I have had contact once more with the Samurai and he has delivered me a welcome boon.

Not two days ago, the Samurai Contact Nodule began to tremble and throb mightily in my bag. This, I knew, could mean but one thing. The Master of Shadowy Might was at hand! I looked to and listened fro and soon upon the ground before me did he appear with a terrible harrumphing. I told him of those deplorable Legions of Leapers Wee and he leapt about and sniffed furiously. When he found no hiding Leaper he leapt again and spoke.

“Leapers Wee bad! Pan good! Find Pan!"

Once more he then harrumphed and thrust his eyes at me, and once more I cowered into my very body in fear. After a bit of fearful blathering I succeeded in relating to him my situation. I was indeed seeking to seek Pan and find it there whence it might be finally found. In Voonville did it surely lie, I assured him. He narrowed his bulging eyes and considered my words in what would have been silence if not for a phummorous gurgle that escaped his innermost self.

“Foolish Weem!” he cried. “Voonville in Canada! Very far!”

Such despair did I endure at those words as I have not tasted since I slept a loathsome night under a yammer tree in the Wold of Woe. Canada! Oh that I should be destined for such a bottomous place. Then within myself I summoned a great bloating of courage. For even though darkest Canada be my sojourn’s end, I shall gladly suffer such that I might wrest from my wicked progeny my Anne who is thoroughly captured and long un-nubbled.

Then did the Samurai loose a terrific howl, and in swift answer did that hairiest of allies lope into view from a perch unseen. The Sha-Una came upon us with hair and hope and saluted the Samurai smartly. The Samurai bulged his eyes back at the Sha-Una and pointed a shadowy finger northward.

Canada!” he said and then was gone.

Ere I could still my trembling head, I was swept up and stuffed handily into a great, warm, and rather comfy marsupial pouch. I looked up and the Sha-Una smiled down at me there within. A great howl issued from that hairiest of allies and we were away at a great wonder of a loping speed the likes of which my plodding could never match. From within my pouch of flesh and hair I peered out at the passing world and marveled. With such speed to bear me onward, I shall see my Voonville soon.


Blogger Andrew Peterson said...

The Sha-Una is, in my mind, the strangest being ever. Ever. And, is the pouch kinda moist? That's how I always imagine marsupial pouches. Ewwwwww.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006 12:20:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Moist! Moist!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006 11:35:00 PM  
Blogger Tim Bourne said...

Moist. Moist.

What a fun word.

Moist. :-p

Wednesday, March 01, 2006 11:40:00 PM  

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